Judge Them Not

"Don't judge me, because I sin differently than you."

I've seen this quote a lot, just within the past week alone. Makes you think, right?

We all do wrong, whether in secret or out in the open. Some of us (definitely including me) are blessed that our secret sins weren't exposed for all the world to see. We are blessed that God exposed them to us, and that He granted us grace and another chance to fix what was broken.

It's truly amazing how we can see the flaws clear as day in someone else, but when the mirror is turned back on us...what then? It's crazy how we get entertained by judging, gossiping, talking about others behind their backs....whatever you want to call it. We all do it...don't act too innocent.

I had a check in my spirit earlier today, and I'm still "wow'd" over it...ashamed really.

I found out on Facebook that another young person I know is expecting a baby, and she's not married, and "oh no, there goes another one...another statistic." PAUSE.

Who do I think I am?

I was her age once...with certain feelings for the opposite sex. I did my share of sneaking around, all while still a faithful member of my church. I tested God's grace way too many times to count, all the while thinking that I could just ask for forgiveness each time and continue doing wrong things contrary to His word.

The only difference between me and her was that I didn't get caught. That's probably a lot of our testimonies, if we would be honest with ourselves.

I say all this to say....


Remember we all have flaws, and not all of our flaws are the same (or even similar). Instead of looking someone up and down in judgement by the flaws we see on them outwardly, we should take the time to pray for them more than we talk about them. I mean, who made you God? That's clearly His job.

Now THIS is love

If it's not one thing...

You ever heard that quote, "If it's not one thing it's another?" I've heard that quote alot in the last couple of days. My uncle had an emergency unexpected brain surgery yesterday morning. I was at my sisters house and we got the call saying he was taken to the hospital. Once we got there and found out the severity of the situation I must admit, I was not in a good place. I remember thinking, "I don't understand. Not again God."

I've only known one other person that survived his condition. We've lost about three relatives/family friends to the same thing and I just didn't want to think about the possibilities of losing him. And the fact that he's in his 30s just made it even more unexpected. I'm grateful to say that his surgery went well. But a lot of things were going through my head.

Life is not a guarantee. I know that and have always known that but it can be easy at times to forget. It's a blessing to have such a large family. But along with that comes the possibility of taking one another for granted. During the holidays everyone tries to go the extra mile to get together but even if that doesn't happen, "There's always Christmas or next year." Or because my family is so large, everyone usually can't get together at one place so holidays usually consist of a few different places we all can choose from. When really, who knows what will happen next Christmas. Why not NOW?

As I was driving home last night, it finally hit me what really happened and how that short time frame could have changed each of our lives for good. But I am so glad that his surgery went well and we don't have to say "what if" or "I wish I would have." God has graced each of us with more TIME with each other.

Alot of times we push things off or procrastinate. But that's a scheme of the enemy who tries to make us believe that we have an endless amount of time. But it only takes a second for our lives to change. When I finally saw him after his surgery and he was awake and knew who I was (which I wasn't expecting after having brain surgery), I wanted to climb in his lap and just hold on to him. Of course I probably would've been carried out lol But I was so grateful that God graced him with more time and that brain surgery is not too complicated for our Heavenly Father.

Thanking God for His healing Power. If' its not one thing it's another. But we have the ability to speak to that giant and it will come down. When we are in situations that are out of our control, it's a reminder that we serve the One who has it ALL in control. I ask that you keep my uncle in your prayers. That he will have a healthy and smooth recovery and that all is well for his wife and children.

Cherish those you love and make sure they know it.

Condemnation

"My levees' are broken
My walls are coming down on me
My rain is falling
Defeat is calling
I need you to set me free
Take me far away from the battle
I need you
Shine on me!

I look to you,
I look to you
After all my strength is gone
In you I can be strong
I look to you,
I look to you
And when melodies are gone In you I hear a song
I look to you"

I was listening to this song earlier. I don't remember how I got to it but I was on Youtube and after clicking enough of the "Related Videos" from my initial search, I came across this song. For those who don't know, this is Whitney Houston's song "I look to you." And the more I listened to it, the sadder I became.

When I think about Whitney Houston, her gifts, life, talent, death etc., I think about how many people condemned her. On Facebook there were either one of two things. Either people were talking about how sad they were OR they were condemning her, talking about her lifestyle, drug addiction, etc. One of the things that bugged me was someone saying "If she REALLY loved God she wouldn't have been living ungodly!"Ungodliness is anything that is not godly right? In that category would include lying, gossiping, envy, doubt, fear, the list can go on and on. Being in need of deliverance doesn't disqualify a person from being a Christian. FYI

I truly believe she loved the Lord. I'm not justifying any decision that she made at all but if we're talking about being Godly, when does Jesus ever say that we are to condemn others?  I'm sure we all can admit, at some point we've found ourselves in situations that reeled us in and put us in a position that required deliverance. When looking at the lyrics of this song, she was crying out for help just like so many people are. I come across so many people who turned away from God/church because they were condemned instead of loved.

It bothers me when people can so quickly turn the finger and condemn others once they've already fallen and hit the bottom but so many don't pray and uplift them while they're still in the air. Whitney Houston was just an example I wanted to use to express the importance of intercession as it pertains to people we know and people we don't know. "So and so did this ungody thing, said this ungodly thing, is acting this ungodly way, talking this ungodly stuff" Ok so he/she is operating in their human sinful nature. So how many times have you prayed for them, fasted for them or encouraged them?

We have to love each other! Not only love one another but be reflections of God's love. Otherwise, we will lose people to the enemy. As Christians we are a physical representation of God. I saw a quote a while back that said "I wish I had met Christ before I met a Christian." And honestly, Christians can be the most judgmental and condemning people. When we see a person operating in any spirit other the the Spirit of God, we need to intercede on their behalf and not send them straight to hell.

I prayed to God a while back that He would help me become a woman of prayer. That He would put the desire in my heart to pray more and He did. I wake up in the middle of the night sometimes to pray for people I don't even know. Sounds crazy probably but so many people are in need of prayer that God may give me a name of someone who is in need. God knows their name and their need so I just allow the Holy Spirit to use me as a vessel.

I was raised by powerful anointed women of God who prayed and prayed and prayed. I've had that example my whole life. But it wasn't until God showed me the desperate need of love in the world that I began to understand why it is so important.

When a person loves God but is living a lifestyle other that how God wants them to, when a person has turned away from God and strayed from what they know as the Truth, or when a person doesn't believe in God at all, PRAY and PRAY and PRAY again. There's no need to gossip and complain or judge and condemn. There's no need to tell others about it, just pray uplift and encourage. God revealed it to YOU so there's no need to expose it to others. I am where I am because there were people praying for ME because I know at one point I was caught up in a place that you would think I didn't know God let alone love Him.

 In order for us to be who we are called to be in Christ, we have to love people. We can't walk out in who God has created us to be if we can't accept and love others in the same way that the prodigal father accepted and loved his prodigal son. (Luke 15:11-31)

You Can Be Bitter Or...

You can be bitter about events that play out in your life, or you could use those very things to make you better.

You can choose to have a nasty attitude when things don't go your way, or you could be thankful that you're still a necessary ingredient for this Earth.

You can allow yourself to get worked up over simple things that don't even matter, or just  b r e a t h e and trust that GOD (who knows all things) will work everything out for your good.


You can live in unforgiveness and hold grudges all day long. And you might actually think you're doing something by hardening your heart. But in reality, the other person isn't moved by your reactions to their piercing actions. They have moved on with life, and are sleeping peacefully at night.

I may sound like Tyler Perry when I say, "Forgiveness isn't for the other person; it's for you." But it's all biblical.

"In prayer there is a connection between what God does and what you do. You can't get forgiveness from God, for instance, without also forgiving others. If you refuse to do your part, you cut yourself off from God's part." Matthew 6:15 (Message)


Don't hold up your own blessings. You most certainly will get hurt in this life; it's just necessary to the flow of things. Everything can't be sunshine, rainbows, and ice cream all day/everyday. You will have low and lonely moments, but these are the defining junctures that set you up for a comeback. In the end, [if you're living right] your good days will outweigh your bad days.


And there's your encouragement of the day!


On the same note....


I was craving some chicken tortilla soup from Chick-fil-A today, despite the summery 70 degree weather. Have you tried it? That stuff is the bomb.com! Anyways, I go in the drive-thru and I get to see a few of my co-workers. Everyone's happy to see me, I get my soup (and I even check the bag), and I drive all the way home. I prepare to eat my soup out on the deck since it's SOO nice outside, only to find out that they gave me the wrong soup...chicken noodle! Really?! I contemplated on whether I should drive back up there or just be satisfied with what I got. And.....I wasn't satisfied, since I really really wanted that tortilla one! Bottom line, I got to get the soup I paid for and keep the other soup. I don't know about you, but I saw it as a blessing in disguise. God knew I would be hungry! Because He knows I'm a hungry and growing girl....yes growing! Haha!

You are valuable!

So tonight it's on my heart to talk about SELF WORTH. I was blessed to grow up in a very loving home. I was always told that I deserved the best. I realize that not everyone had the same up bringing as I did and some people really don't know what they truly deserve.

Even though I was always told that I deserved the best, I still found myself settling with certain situations in life. Not necessarily from a lack of self worth but moreso because I was giving in to convenience. But I've learned my lesson and will never do that again. Candice and I were having a conversation tonight after church and one of the things we talked about was the fact that people need space to build a foundation with God.

I was going over a poem I wrote a while back and it talks about how God began showing me who I really am AFTER He began removing people out of my life. I've been on this journey of self discovery for 23 years now and I've JUST begun to scratch the surface. And I believe that I'm finally getting there because I'm focusing all my attention on GOD. I write a lot of encouraging statuses on Facebook and one of the things that came to me the other day was "Don't spend more time studying 'How to be a wife/husband" that you neglect to study 'How to be a Christian." (Or something along those lines)

Any relationship can not properly sustain without a solid foundation in Jesus Christ. I won't assume everyone knows how a person receives salvation so I'll explain. Salvation is received when you repent of your sins and ask Jesus Christ to come into your heart. You MUST believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God who came to earth to die for our sins so that we will have the opportunity to live eternally in heaven. Salvation isn't received until you accept JESUS. hence the word CHRISTian.

It is with that acceptance that you begin to comprehend how much you truly are worth to God. That's why it's so important to truly KNOW Him. Not just hear about it, not just believe He existed but KNOW Him. Love without Jesus Christ is no love at all. It is with that relationship that you learn how to love.

I hope everyone knows how much, not only God but Jesus Christ, loves you! You are invaluable to Him. So much that He was willing to give His life for You. I know most people desire companionship but without a relationship with Jesus, you won't be able to see what you truly deserve.

My church started singing a hymn I grew up on Sunday, "I know it was the blood." Although they still sing modern songs, I've really warmed up to hearing hymns again. You can't take Jesus or the blood of Jesus out of church. You can't be saved without them! There really is power in those songs. I was feeling it lol Like for real!

Anyway, embrace this season of singleness.  Allow your heart to overflow with the love that Jesus has to offer. Once you've given Jesus your heart THEN everything else will be added. Most of us want families one day. But you can't have a CHRISTian relationship, whether married or dating, without a firm relationship with Jesus Christ. Remember that you deserve the best! Know your worth and walk in it! You've been brought with a price. :-)

I Wanna Live A Life Poured Out!

It's just something about today's main event--attending my neighbor's homegoing service. I've been thinking frequently throughout the day that "only what you do for Christ will last." I'm blasting this song in my room right now, and it's pumping me to just go forth and finally be about my Father's business wholeheartedly. I wanna get to that level where I just don't care what people think. My main goal in life is to obey God and do what he tells me to do when He tells me to do it. I wanna please Him in all I do, and I just want to see Him smile and tell me, "Well done, my good and faithful servant."

There's an entire world out there that needs to be touched by God's ever-changing pure love. So many people are suffering unnecessarily, while we {Christians} are just standing by watching. We're sleeping on our gifts and talents, while someone's life is depending on what we have to offer.

Like the song states, "I wanna live a life poured out!" That's my prayer for you and I. Let's go!!!

Those Boo-Loving Christmas Songs

I absolutely LOVE Christmas music, and there's so many varieties within the genre. However, a LOT of Christmas songs would best be sung if you had a special boo that it applied to. Several of these songs imply spending the holiday with your significant other, and just gaining all those warm, fuzzy, lovey-dovey feelings.

But, what if you're single...like me?

It just makes you want someone to share the holiday with. It's cold outside, just perfect cuddling weather. Don't act like you don't like cuddling. I don't know what it is about winter and the holidays that just makes me want somebody, anybody! lol...just kidding! I'm not that desperate. :)

But just be careful in listening to these "boo-loving" Christmas songs. They have the power to tempt you to do things you know you shouldn't do. Like call up an ex just to "see how they're doing." Mmmhmm...you better stay focused, and stop worrying about when love will happen for you!

I know it's hard. Especially when you hear Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas Is YOU."

Or what about that Boyz II Men line, "Come over here! And help me trim the tree...." I don't know about you but that line at 1:30 always gives me chills. I just love that assertiveness! lol

And I love anyone's version to this song. Can't listen to it too much, though, or I will be found wanting a man.

It's crazy how certain songs can affect and dictate your feelings and emotions, if you allow them to. All I'm saying is just be careful when you're casually listening to those "boo-loving" Christmas songs. You may need to switch to some "Silent Night," "Oh Holy Night," or "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" to stay out of trouble (if you know what I mean)! Ha!

Everybody seems to be in search for a "winter boo." But don't give up and don't give in, single ladies! Remember that a man who finds a wife, finds a good thing. It doesn't matter the season, you still have to be found. Don't rearrange how the order is supposed to flow, just because you are impatient. A lot of things happen when you least expect them to. When you're trying to piece situations together and create combinations on your own (that weren't meant to formulate in the first place), disaster can occur. And you push back your true destiny. So, be wise during this season. =)

LOVE People

Whew! Haven't seen you all in a while! Looks like Candice has been holding the site down in my absence. So for those of you who don't know, I now attend Liberty University which is a Christian university. I transferred from VCU this past January. And all I can say is I'm learning so much!!! Not just academically but spiritually. I'm currently taking a discipleship counseling class and an evangelism class (amongst a few others) and my textbooks are literally books that I would probably read on my own, so I'm enjoying it.

One thing I'm learning everyday is the importance of LOVE.

Now we all know we're suppose to love each other right? If not, now you know! But I'm beginning to understand it more and more. The discipleship counseling class is teaching me a healthy balance. I've always been the "counselor." People have always been comfortable venting to me or asking my advice and I think it's because I'm a good listener. Through that class I've learned the importance of pouring into others only when I've been poured into.

I say that because I haven't always done that. I wrote a poem not too long ago and part of the poem said, "Who will counsel the counselor and encourage the encourager?" Anyone who serves others in those areas have probably had the feeling at some point where everyone expects you to have the answers and neglect to realize you may have your OWN questions. But that's what I'm learning...

EVERYTHING GOES BACK TO GOD AND HIS LOVE.

I can't help others if I don't allow the love of God to fill me up so I can pour out on them. Both my evangelism and counseling courses have taught me that. One of my friends is a songwriter and in one of his songs he says "How can I feed the multitude but in the meantime I'm starving ME." Or something along those lines.

Balance is important! And making sure I don't allow anyone to make me their god is even more important. Anything I do ministry wise, whether counseling, evangelism, or just simple encouragement should in the end, direct them back to God. Counselors automatically want to help people solve their issues but wisdom is making sure you love the person enough to not BLOCK God's love from them.

There's only one Saviour and there's only so much one person can do. I've learned that planting a seed in someone whose lost or someone whose broken may be all that God requires of me to do so that then He can introduce His love. I knew these things, but certain times I've gotten wrapped up in the moment and poured out more and more and more. When God was saying "Ok! Let me do MY job now." You must love people enough to get out of the way of the holy spirit.

It all goes back to His love for us and the desire He has for us to want Him. He's desperate for us and no one should take His place. Understanding His love is what will draw us to Him. It's what will provoke us to love and encourage others. It's what transforms us from who we are into who we're called to be. His love is what causes us to want others to know it. And I'm honored that God wants to introduce others to His love through me, as long as I know how to get out of the way when He does.

Excited to learn more!

What the World Needs Is LOVE!

Did you know that love is the GREATEST gift you could ever give? Sow a seed of LOVE today, not merely because it's Christmas time. You should always be willing to give, no matter what season it is. And for the umpteenth time, this season is NOT about YOU! It's not about what you can get. I'm sure these words are cliche and elementary, because we hear these things all the time. However, some folks still have their wires crossed.

This season of love and giving should not leave you feeling stressed, frantic, or on the verge of accumulating hundreds of dollars in debt. We celebrate this season by giving to our family, friends, and loved ones. You don't have to go into debt to give. Give what you have, and if you don't have anything...give LOVE!! Hugs will never go out of style. As well, as just being there...to support, to help, and to encourage.

Day 21: My Thankful

Happy early Thanksgiving people!

I'm really thankful for this family vibe, man. It all starts at home with the family. Get it together folks. =)

I'm sure y'all probably get so bored with my thankfuls, as many relate to food and God.....welp, oh well! lol You only have 9 more days to read my ramblings, or just ignore. Anywho....

I'm thankful for peace, love, joy, happiness, hope, and faith. Yea, all of those.

I'm thankful that I'm still cooking a lil somethin somethin for Thanksgiving. Originally, I volunteered to just have my way and cook the entire Thanksgiving meal (not including the turkey). I guess that was a pretty wild an unbelievable idea, since my mom filled my position by either buying items from my church's kitchen or cooking the things herself. Well! One thing's for certain though; my carrots are on the menu! Whoop! Whoop! I still wanted to do more for the feast, so I bought ingredients to fix banana pudding and cookie dough cheesecake bars. I'm excited!! I'm fixing those in the AM, and I'm hoping they come out ok. haha...This was probably not a smart idea to experiment on the guests, but I gotta contribute! My hands are hot! lol

This is what they are supposed to look like. Scrumptious huh? We shall see my results.

I'm thankful that I'm going to heaven! Where you going? Romans 10:9-10. 

I'm thankful in advance that today is gonna be a GREAT day! I'm declaring that the rest of 2011 is gonna be awesome as well. I'm just excited and giddy for no particular reason. Life is good! Enjoy this day with your family and friends. Touch someone's life, be a light, laugh a little harder, relish the moments, listen to the wisdom of the elders in your life, eat and enjoy the food as if there's an endless supply [no gluttony please :) ], and love your peeps like you love yourself.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!

Day 18: My Thankful

I'm thankful that Cece Winans ministered at my church today. I absolutely LOVE her! I have at least 4 of her CDs, not including the ones when she collaborated with her brother Bebe Winans. Her worship is pure, and you can just tell she's an anointed genuine person. I really enjoyed it!

I'm thankful for my good days, as well as my bad days.

I'm thankful that I barely had cramps this month!! Ladies, you understand... :)

I'm thankful that I've learned the principle of talking/encouraging myself when I'm going through stuff. I no longer put up with stints of emotional and depressing thoughts. I might feel some kind of way for a moment, but I realize I must push forward and not stay in that state.

I'm thankful that my brother comes home later on today!! YAY! I've missed that kid!

I'm thankful that God understands and loves me, when I don't even love or understand myself at times.

I'm thankful that I haven't withdrawn from any classes this semester. I think I've withdrawn from a course every semester since I've been enrolled in college. That was 2007. Think of all that money lost. Smh! Well, I'm glad I'm finally sticking it out. Even though my grades are C's and above right now, I'm grateful I'm making more progress to getting my Bachelor's in Professional Writing (similar to Journalism).

I'm thankful for my hubby, whoever you are. I hope that you're on the path to wholeness like I am, discovering who you are and the purpose that you are assigned to complete while on this Earth. =)

Why wholeness is important

I'm not a relationship counselor but I'm led to share this...

A while back I wrote a list of the things that are negotiable and the things that aren't. Every so often I take the list out and make tweaks and adjustments based on newer revelations and greater wisdom. One of the main things I realized is if you don't know what you want, then there's no need to expect it yet. I read a book a while back entitled, "Before you do." It had a very extensive list of questions that everyone should ask their potential interest.

I read that probably about three years ago and while going through the questions, I remembered many of them I couldn't answer myself. So that made me realize the importance of being whole before entering a relationship. Otherwise, you open yourself up to be manipulated and taken advantage of. A lot of people who end up with low self-esteem allowed a person to tell them who they were and then they actually believed it. If you wait until you're whole to let someone in, you already know who you are and won't be persuaded to think otherwise.

TO THE LEFT, TO THE LEFT

That may seem harsh but in reality, when you're a whole person and know who you are, that's not too hard to say when you come across a person that just isn't quite up to par. That's where your list comes in handy. If you already have made up in your mind what you refuse to settle for, if someone doesn't meet the standard then you have no problem letting them know they are not for you. For example, let's say you definitely want children and that is on your list of non-negotiables. But IN walks this incredibly handsome, educated man of God that seems to have it all together. After "the talk" he says he doesn't want any kids. Now someone who does not have a firm foundation will say, "Hmm, I know he doesn't want children but he is ALMOST to good to be true. Maybe he'll change his mind. He's interested so I better go for it." Now someone who has a firm foundation will say, "He's handsome and educated but he just does not meet the standard. To the left, to the left." That's a woman who knows what she wants and refuses to settle.

My bishop has said in the past that you shouldn't look at where a person currently is but you should look at their potential. Now I definitely agree with that but one thing that's also important is that the person also knows their own potential. Otherwise you're in the mode of "transformer," meaning the "I can change them" mindset. NEGATIVE! Most people will aim as far as they can see. If they can't seem themselves higher or further then they won't strive for it. If ambitious is on your list of non-negotiables then a person with a tainted self image or lack of drive may need more time to work on themselves.

Now certain things, I feel might be a stretch. You shouldn't be expecting the perfect person, otherwise you'll be disappointed. But I feel that God will reveal certain characteristics that will help you know when "the one" has appeared. But you should also have discernment and know enough about yourself to know when "the one" hasn't. Patience is key to getting what you really desire. The enemy doesn't want an ordained union so many times he'll send distractions. Some that look and act like "the promise" and some that don't. But patience is one of the things that separate the wolves from the sheep. A wolf can only stay in sheep's' clothing for so long before their "wolfy" characteristics surface. So how mature is your discernment?

"A woman's heart should be so hidden in God that a man should have to seek Him in order to find it."

That's one of my favorite quotes. My mom always told me it's important for a young lady to have tunnel vision, meaning that you're so focused on God that when someone does appear, you're in a mindset of "OK so who sent you?" Not in a rude or negative way but in a "I'm focused and don't want my time wasted so if you are who you say you are, show me before I let you in" kind of way. The closer Ive gotten to focus, the more I understand it. The more I understand it, the more I realize the importance of knowing who you are in Christ FIRST. Opportunities will present themselves but when you have a solid relationship with God, you know when someone is helping that relationship or when they're hindering it. An addition should make life better. Don't add a person that subtracts your progress.

It seems like a lot but in reality, God has asked for our hearts, males and females. Not just part of our hearts but the whole thing. When God knows we have trusted Him with every part of ourselves, he knows He can bless us with "the one" and we won't forget our FIRST love. We'll know who we are and won't believe anyone but God. Don't settle for whose available just because they're available or settle for someone who doesn't have the characteristics on your non negotiable list. But recognize when you're still in the molding phase, when you and God are secluded in your own private place. When distractions have no chance and your heart aches with love for Jesus alone. THAT'S where He wants us. So that when "the one" does appear, it may not be perfect but it'll be a solid relationship of THREE, a non destroyable foundation.