I knew I was going to marry him

One thing I've learned over my 24 years of living is that sometimes while you're IN your current situation, you don't recognize the severity of your situation. Sometimes it takes taking yourself out of that situation for just a moment and asking yourself, "If this wasn't my current circumstance but the circumstance of someone I love, what would it look like to me?"

There are so many things that can blind us of our situations. In reference to relationships, there are reasons why God desires us to save sex until marriage. Not only does He want us to live purely but God knows of the bonds that are created when people engage in sex before marriage. Sex is a representation of "forever" which is why people use the phrase "soul tie." A soul tie will blind you and keep you from walking away from circumstances that are no good for you. And there's also the "yo yo effect" when a soul tie keeps a person going back to a someone who you were never meant to be with in the beginning.

It doesn't always take sex to create a soul tie. I'm sure the majority of people at some point in their lives have allowed their minds to entertain a thought. That thought turned into a paragraph which then turned into a story which then turned into a novel all while reality had yet to even take one step.

I remember when I was in middle school. I'm ashamed to say it but I was a HUGE B2K fan. My friends, cousins, and I would always go to their concerts. We met them a couple of times and it just seemed like the best times of our lives. I was specifically "in love" with Omarion. I knew I was going to marry him. I spent so much time daydreaming about how things would be WHEN we got married, WHEN we had kids, etc. I was completely convinced that we were meant for one another. Clearly, that was crazy. But in my 12 year old mind, I had idolized this person to the point that I thought I KNEW  all about him when I didn't even know him. Needless to say, when he kissed Jennifer Freeman in the "Girlfriends" video, I was heartbroken. (But that's a different post lol)

But that's the exact thing that some people do today as adults. They can't let someone go, whose obviously a red flag because they've allowed their mind to connect the happiness of their future with a person of their present, who God intended to be in their past. I can respect blindness. We've all been blind at some point in our lives. But there also comes a point where we have to see ourselves as the kings and queens that we are.

My challenge to you, no matter how you feel about your current situation, relationship, job, etc,. is to step back a moment and ask yourself, "If this was my sister's, brother's, daughter's, son's, mother's or father's circumstance, how would it look to me? What would I tell them? Would I believe God had better for them? Would I think they were in a mode of compromise?" If you'd be happy for them, praise God for His faithfulness in your life. But if there's anything inside of you that makes you doubt that your current situation would be attractive attached to someone you love, then pray that God will fully open your eyes.

If he doesn't treat you the way you would want your daughter to be treated or if she doesn't treat you the way you would want your son to be treated, you are undervaluing yourself. As I said in a previous post, everyone has potential and the ability to change. But when your happiness is a gamble depended on their "change" you may be setting yourself up to lose.