He's my Husband!

So that title is so funny to me! But unfortunately so many people say that, many out of nothing but emotion!

I was having a chat with a few of my friends Sunday night, two guys and two girls. I enjoy those types of convos. I like hearing what my brothers think about certain things and I'm comfortable talking to them about things like that.

We talked about HEALTHY friendships of the opposite sex. I was saying how it's important to me that I have a least one or two close male friends. We all have the ability to discern things but it's nice to have an opinion from the other side because most of us know that most males and females think differently.

We talked about how some people are incapable of having friendships with the opposite sex. If they text you, they must like you. If they act happy to see you, they must like you. If they are friendly, they must like you. If you have inside jokes, they must like you. If they smile around you, they must like you lol But those are the things friends do. That doesn't mean they're your husband or wife lol It doesn't even mean that they like you! It's called FRIENDSHIP.

Now don't think I'm condemning anyone, I've been interested in a few people in my day. And my previous relationship was the one when I was like "Yes he's my husband." Not because God had said it but my emotions told me while we were together. I've had crushes on people or thought someone was attractive and thought to myself "I wonder if it's him!" But it didn't go further than a thought and often was rebuked before it came around again. And most times the holy spirit would check me before it went any further. Guard your heart!

But some people end up with emotional ties after breaking up from a relationship they were never in. All because a FRIEND of the opposite sex was being a FRIEND. I'm not trying to be mean but we're talking about being whole right? Part of being whole is knowing the purpose of the people in your life. A divine connection doesn't mean a divine relationship ending in holy matrimony. CHRISTIAN DOESN'T MEAN COMPATIBLE. I think alot of people would avoid broken hearts if females saw males as their brothers, and males saw females as their sisters. If a person doesn't say, "I'm interested in you" then assume that they aren't!

Friends should be able to talk as much as they want. Smile and laugh as much as they want. And not have to be overly cautious believing that their actions will be leading somebody on. A person with maturity knows that someone who has a purpose in their life is there to fulfill SOMETHING. But they know to keep their mind in check. Cut out the daydreaming and reading into actions. Sometimes we read so deeply into things and daydream so much we've mapped out how many kids and where we're going to live before anyone has even expressed interest.

Don't confuse your emotions for the holy spirit. We've all been in that position at least once but let's not only guard our own hearts but guard the hearts of our brothers and sisters. We're in this together. Ladies, let's give the fellas a break. WE are the PRIZE. The prize doesn't hunt down the winner, the winner has to go after the prize. If a male is friendly, checks up on you, smiles and makes you laugh, he's being a good friend. That doesn't make him your husband and vice versa.

Lastly I will say that WE individually have to use discernment as to who of the opposite sex we can be friends with. Some people aren't ready for it. And that's perfectly fine but make sure there are no hidden intentions. Friendships with the hope of an eventual relationship is usually a bad idea. Now if it ends up being God's plan, wonderful! If not, wonderful!

I thank God for my male friends as well as that revelation. That's vital info for healthy friendships. That way mine as well as their hearts are protected. No hidden intentions or expectations. Just pure and uninhibited friendship! Thankful for maturity and grateful for that convo!