Check His Track Record

I admit that sometimes I subject my mind to the "what ifs" of life, and I tend to worry (for a minute) on situations that are simply just out of my control. Tonight was one of those nights; I began to ponder on some things...things that I thought were pretty stable and concrete in my life. However, now, I feel a shift taking place. But I'm not gonna get specific, because I really don't know what's going on just yet...lol.

Anywho...So as I was pondering these things, God reminded me that He is and has always been a Provider in my life. He is definitely my source! My job, family, and even friends could never ever give to me what He's given to me. He's known me through it all, before it all, and He'll know me after it's all said and done with on this Earth.

Whenever I'm in a tough spot, I like to replay God's track record in my mind. He's never let me down. Like the old folks used to say, "He may not come when you want Him, but He's always on time." Of course, I've felt like He wasn't listening to my prayers and/or He was just too far away from little ol' me and my "problems." But when I look back at all those difficult, trying moments, He always Always ALWAYS brought me out.

I remember having low self-esteem and being extremely shy. It's a miracle that I'm doing this right now. I stayed in my shell, barely coming out for air. I cried myself to sleep many many nights. I cried out to God on several occasions, asking Him why He made me so different from everyone else.. People thought I was a weird, quiet girl in school.

I know what it's like not to have friends outside of family. I know what it's like not having anyone to sit with at lunch. I know the feeling of being "looked over," as if my very existence doesn't matter. Like you're only talking to me because you're merely tolerating me. To this day, I know of at least 2 people who just don't like me for whatever reason; they only tolerate me because we have mutual friends. (And I'm not just saying that. Discernment is an amazing thing.) I've been used, cheated on, cussed at, lied on, lied to, etc...but God was right there listening to my prayers muffled by my crying.

When my heart was broken, he mended it. He worked on it, giving me the tools to regain wholeness. His angels comforted me when I was on the brink of death...when I wanted to commit suicide because life was just too much to bear. Because I thought no one loved me. Because I thought I was a nobody and that no one would even notice that I was gone.

BUT GOD....!

He has brought me to a place of so much joy and peace. These last couple of weeks I've been experiencing unexplainable joy. I've just been so HAPPY! And HOPEFUL! And EXCITED! I'm thankful that my Father brought me out of my gloomy days from way back then. Or else I wouldn't have a clue as to what was waiting for me. I'm on the verge of experiencing Heaven on Earth! He's given me dreams and assignments that have yet to reach the world, but I'm just thankful for His patience with me.

To wrap it up, you can do ANYTHING and I mean ANYTHING with Christ! If ever in doubt at what God can do, just check His track record! He's done something in your life, whether you believe in Him or not. Continue to show Him appreciation for everything you can think of, and just watch where He takes you!  =)