Weird Week...

This week has definitely been a weird week for me.  First, I kept constantly waking up in the middle of the night choking (yea, scary).  My doctor later told me I was probably dealing with acid reflux.  I didn't even know what that was; I'd heard of it.  But after taking the pills the doctor gave me, I was fine.


However, I was immediately struck with all these cold/flu symptoms: sore throat, runny/stuffed nose, and just feeling super cold and/or hot.


Then one day, I just woke up feeling empty.  Like, nothing matters anymore. Like, I was scared to live/scared to die. I just felt "down" inside, even though on the outside I appeared to be my usual self...just a little sickly.


So, I've been doing a lot of thinking about my life and this blog. I've been thinking of how "busy" I've been lately, and how God just seems sooo far away in the midst of my so-called "busy" life.  My relationship with Him seems too stale right now. Probably because I often just give Him drive-bys of my time. (That could be a primary reason why I'm feeling empty). I'm guilty of putting my friends, family, money, jobs, school, success, and other desires over Him. He's the most important part of my being, but I leave Him on the shelf most days and only talk to Him for less than 5 min a day. Sad.


Yea, changes need to take place and sacrifices need to be made starting today.  I think I will watch Passion of the Christ later, just to be reminded of the price that was paid for me.  I need to fall back in love with Jesus and stop worrying about silly things.  This scripture has been on REPEAT in my mind.

Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.

Matthew 6:33-34 (The Message)

To be honest, it wasn't really my goal to get all spiritual on this Project Wifey blog.  I really had no intention of putting any scriptures up here or getting all gushy over God. But that's crazy and a shame, because I AM a Christian and Jesus CAN be EVERYTHING to me and YOU if we let Him.  I'm still learning a lot about that, and I guess this is what the blog is about.

I have no set agenda for this; I just want and need to be whole.  So, maybe first things first. I need to seek the help and assistance of GOD before anyone or anything!  He is the source of my joy and peace.

As I mentioned in my last post, I think I'm in another position to be broken. It hurts a little right now, and a lot of things don't make sense.  However, I know it's all working for my good....back to sleep now. haha...oh, and pick up Kirk Franklin's latest CD HELLO FEAR. It's working wonders for me in my "blahhh" state...